pre-text: for someone who actively makes his dreams reality, his passion something tangible.
muse: sda
about a boy
who thought he became a man the night he turned twentyone
he knows what he knows
but he doesnt know what he doesnt know
push the boundaries of your life as you know it
out of this small town and into the world
walk into the horizon
with your sturdy guitar and dirty blue backpack
meet new people engage in deep conversations
on politics, religion and this thing we call life
read books on philosophy
and apply them wholesale to his way of living
i am no one to criticise
but it does not seem wise to me
still go on and walk into the horizon
with passion for life burning strong in you
and if you have any left at the end of the day
write a song for me, a song about me
and sing it in a small obscure cafe
tapping your feet and swaying side to side
and write me a letter every few months
so i know you are still missing me
and yes go on walking into the horizon
with your sturdy guitar and dirty blue backpack
Monday, June 27, 2005
Thursday, June 23, 2005
fall
pre-text: the many ways you can fall.
muse: sda
fell in love with you
fell into a bed of roses together with you
fell out with you
fell out of the clouds
fell onto my knees
fell from your grace
fell into your bad books
fell apart into pieces
fell into solitary without you
and
now i am falling deeper and deeper
into this abyss of unknown
oh where are you now
did you not promise to catch me when i fall?
muse: sda
fell in love with you
fell into a bed of roses together with you
fell out with you
fell out of the clouds
fell onto my knees
fell from your grace
fell into your bad books
fell apart into pieces
fell into solitary without you
and
now i am falling deeper and deeper
into this abyss of unknown
oh where are you now
did you not promise to catch me when i fall?
Saturday, June 18, 2005
don't
pre-text: i am mad at him for all i mentioned...yet i can't seem to let him go. ironic. pathetic.
muse: sda
don't call me a drama queen
just because i cry everytime i think of you
isn't life a continous soap opera?
don't call me weak and lacking in confidence
when you are the one ripping it
out from within me
don't tell me to live in the moment
and you go run away from reality
each time it slaps you in the face
don't tell me you love me
when your words are empty
and your actions...they don't even exist
don't preach your life philosophies to me
because they should only apply to you
and my life is way more intense than your simple simple life
don't reach around me and hold me close
let all my emotions come spilling out
and walk away like nothing happened
don't pretend you are making sweet passionate love to me
when we both know its dwindled down
into plain detached friendly fucking
don't pretend i am the best you will ever have
cause i am just the best you have right now
and someone better will come along
most importantly
don't come back to me
because i don't want you
but i will take you back anyway.
muse: sda
don't call me a drama queen
just because i cry everytime i think of you
isn't life a continous soap opera?
don't call me weak and lacking in confidence
when you are the one ripping it
out from within me
don't tell me to live in the moment
and you go run away from reality
each time it slaps you in the face
don't tell me you love me
when your words are empty
and your actions...they don't even exist
don't preach your life philosophies to me
because they should only apply to you
and my life is way more intense than your simple simple life
don't reach around me and hold me close
let all my emotions come spilling out
and walk away like nothing happened
don't pretend you are making sweet passionate love to me
when we both know its dwindled down
into plain detached friendly fucking
don't pretend i am the best you will ever have
cause i am just the best you have right now
and someone better will come along
most importantly
don't come back to me
because i don't want you
but i will take you back anyway.
voices
pre-text: been stuck in a rut for a long time, and have had friends tell me what i should do, what they think i should do...and of course i have 'significant' persons telling me things and then in the midst of it all, my little tiny voice within. all these just puts voices in my head!
muse: ironically, sda and all my friends who know abt the shit gg on with him
i heard what you said
or did i hear what i wanted
and interpreted what you said differently
when you meant something else
i grew accustomed to believing what you told me
good and bad, truth and lies
and now you are just playing with my mind
you care and you show it
constantly there, never pushing, just supporting
i cry, whine, bitch, scream and threaten to die
still you stand by me to remind me i am never really all alone
same old advice same old instructions
packaged in simplicity and vigourous exasperation
i've heard it all i've heard it all
florence, you are better than this you know it!
you are smart and beautiful (i am not! am i?)
you don't need a guy like him, there are better guys out there (where? where?)
you have to let go (but i love him!)
it is his loss, not yours ( but he is the one leaving me!)
fuck him fuck him and his bullshit his fucking lifestyle his fucking fucked-up attitude (yeah! fuck him!)
listen to yourself, florence, listen to yourself (yes, listen...)
shut up just shut up all of you
i cannot analyse your hidden meanings and ulterior motives
i cannot process your good-willed intentions
i cannot debate with the voices within me
i need everyone around me to keep really quiet
and let me deal with this on my own terms in my own time
but love me any way.
muse: ironically, sda and all my friends who know abt the shit gg on with him
i heard what you said
or did i hear what i wanted
and interpreted what you said differently
when you meant something else
i grew accustomed to believing what you told me
good and bad, truth and lies
and now you are just playing with my mind
you care and you show it
constantly there, never pushing, just supporting
i cry, whine, bitch, scream and threaten to die
still you stand by me to remind me i am never really all alone
same old advice same old instructions
packaged in simplicity and vigourous exasperation
i've heard it all i've heard it all
florence, you are better than this you know it!
you are smart and beautiful (i am not! am i?)
you don't need a guy like him, there are better guys out there (where? where?)
you have to let go (but i love him!)
it is his loss, not yours ( but he is the one leaving me!)
fuck him fuck him and his bullshit his fucking lifestyle his fucking fucked-up attitude (yeah! fuck him!)
listen to yourself, florence, listen to yourself (yes, listen...)
shut up just shut up all of you
i cannot analyse your hidden meanings and ulterior motives
i cannot process your good-willed intentions
i cannot debate with the voices within me
i need everyone around me to keep really quiet
and let me deal with this on my own terms in my own time
but love me any way.
Monday, June 06, 2005
my father
pre-text: i wrote this for my daddy last yr but i didnt have the guts to give it to him...so im sending it in the card that im mailing home for father's day this year. i hope he likes it.
muse: my daddy!!!! :)
my father
i call him daddy, papa at times
whichever gets me my way
people say i look like my father
i have his big talking eyes
his smile, that comes from the heart
even his malay-looking skin
we both tan way too easily
my father
he is the strong, silent type
does not talk nearly as much as me, hardly ever complains
he has his ways of doing things
his stubborn way of thinking
always giving, and never asking for anything in return
everything, he takes in his stride
his nag is not constant, yet amazingly powerful
my father
taught me always to do good
never to slam doors or tables, even when angry
money, he agrees, is meant to be spent
but only wisely
he dresses in his own fashion, which isn't all that bad
he shows me what it means to be yourself and not worry about others
other wise words he often tells me are:
self-discipline, moderation, focus, respect, and family
my father
leads by example
by doing what he has to do
and what he can do
he respects my granny and my aunts
and he volunteers at charitable organizations
he continues to work hard, even at 60 for us, for me
and he is always grateful for what he has
never feeling sorry or pity for himself
my father
and i have something special, something unspoken
we understand each other in someway
i have never heard him say sorry
neither have i heard him say i love you
i guess he has other variations of his own
like we care about you, we looked after you for so long
take care of yourself, don't go out too late
we are thinking of you, the dog misses you
but i know what he means underneath all that
my father
is the first man in my life life
and most probably the most important one too
it may not always seem like the case
but i guess that is the way it goes
my father
is not the wealthiest man or the most powerful one around
but to me
he is my pillar of strength and support, and my sheild
to me, my father is the world's greatest.
muse: my daddy!!!! :)
my father
i call him daddy, papa at times
whichever gets me my way
people say i look like my father
i have his big talking eyes
his smile, that comes from the heart
even his malay-looking skin
we both tan way too easily
my father
he is the strong, silent type
does not talk nearly as much as me, hardly ever complains
he has his ways of doing things
his stubborn way of thinking
always giving, and never asking for anything in return
everything, he takes in his stride
his nag is not constant, yet amazingly powerful
my father
taught me always to do good
never to slam doors or tables, even when angry
money, he agrees, is meant to be spent
but only wisely
he dresses in his own fashion, which isn't all that bad
he shows me what it means to be yourself and not worry about others
other wise words he often tells me are:
self-discipline, moderation, focus, respect, and family
my father
leads by example
by doing what he has to do
and what he can do
he respects my granny and my aunts
and he volunteers at charitable organizations
he continues to work hard, even at 60 for us, for me
and he is always grateful for what he has
never feeling sorry or pity for himself
my father
and i have something special, something unspoken
we understand each other in someway
i have never heard him say sorry
neither have i heard him say i love you
i guess he has other variations of his own
like we care about you, we looked after you for so long
take care of yourself, don't go out too late
we are thinking of you, the dog misses you
but i know what he means underneath all that
my father
is the first man in my life life
and most probably the most important one too
it may not always seem like the case
but i guess that is the way it goes
my father
is not the wealthiest man or the most powerful one around
but to me
he is my pillar of strength and support, and my sheild
to me, my father is the world's greatest.
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
your voice your words
pre-text: sometimes silence is really the best thing to do...when you have nothing 'good' to say to each other. i always miss his voice and i would want to hear it but after we talk, i feel lousier. it is because i hear what he has to say, what his plans are and they all only make me feel like shit. i rather deal with my own voices in my head than his voice on the fone and in my head.
muse: sda
i need to shut you up
shut your voice in my head in my life
you tell me all these things
you say you mean it you say you did not mean it you say you did not mean it that way
i cannot differentiate between your truth and lies your honesty and insincerity
all i hear is your words as they come right out of your mouth
it is so loud that that i cannot think
i cannot hear myself anymore
my life is already built around you
and now my mind is conquered too
i turn your words inside out outside in
analyse in from all angles
break it down letter by letter
consider tone and context
no space left to even seek my own perspective
i am totally exhausted with you
nothing for me to say because you have heard it all
know not what to convince you of
because we have no future together
and no common ground left
losing you now is no longer a big deal
because i have nothing else left to lose.
muse: sda
i need to shut you up
shut your voice in my head in my life
you tell me all these things
you say you mean it you say you did not mean it you say you did not mean it that way
i cannot differentiate between your truth and lies your honesty and insincerity
all i hear is your words as they come right out of your mouth
it is so loud that that i cannot think
i cannot hear myself anymore
my life is already built around you
and now my mind is conquered too
i turn your words inside out outside in
analyse in from all angles
break it down letter by letter
consider tone and context
no space left to even seek my own perspective
i am totally exhausted with you
nothing for me to say because you have heard it all
know not what to convince you of
because we have no future together
and no common ground left
losing you now is no longer a big deal
because i have nothing else left to lose.
Sunday, May 15, 2005
speed dating
pre-text: 'love' in our generation
muse: jb
hello how are you
my name is Florence
shake my hand and yes, you can hold on to it
kiss me quick
passionate sighs and heavy breathing
your hands all over me and mine over you
now we are naked and vulnerable
and we become one in passion and desire
then reality hits us like a boomerang
what just happened, we ask
it is not a one night stand because i do like you
but guess what, we do not have any more time on our hands
no time to figure each other out
you head your way while i stumble along my way
you see, we only had time for our actions to speak for us.
muse: jb
hello how are you
my name is Florence
shake my hand and yes, you can hold on to it
kiss me quick
passionate sighs and heavy breathing
your hands all over me and mine over you
now we are naked and vulnerable
and we become one in passion and desire
then reality hits us like a boomerang
what just happened, we ask
it is not a one night stand because i do like you
but guess what, we do not have any more time on our hands
no time to figure each other out
you head your way while i stumble along my way
you see, we only had time for our actions to speak for us.
a slap in the face
pre-text: wrote this after i got slapped in the face by my dad. not something i am too proud of but it happened. and it happened when i was at this point in my life where i couldn't really care less for anything.
muse: daddy
a slap in the face
and not a drop of tear
the sudden swoop on my face stings
my ears, i hear them ring
but i almost welcome the numbing pain
gives me an excuse to cry a pouring rain
standing in front of you, i just don't know what to do
i can hear your boiling blood pumping through you
i feel breathless as you heave
you ask me the same old questions, i only want to leave
so i don't have another person to answer to
cause you and me makes two
i smoke and i drink and i swear
i push you to your limits as much as i dare
maybe i am just testing your patience and maybe your love
because i got fucked so bad, everything's a blur
can't find no answers to nothing, i turn to distractions
self aware of my ways of self destruction
i ride on the fleeting highs
in hope to counterbalance the lows in my mind
no it does not do me good in the long run
but it was never my goal to be a nun
i indulge in the vices whilst i long for something sturdy, steadfast and strong
something you have been offering me all along
yet i pull out and push you away
give up on me, that is all i can say
let me dwell in my bottomless hole, grapple with my issues
and fight my own demons because now i don't need you
muse: daddy
a slap in the face
and not a drop of tear
the sudden swoop on my face stings
my ears, i hear them ring
but i almost welcome the numbing pain
gives me an excuse to cry a pouring rain
standing in front of you, i just don't know what to do
i can hear your boiling blood pumping through you
i feel breathless as you heave
you ask me the same old questions, i only want to leave
so i don't have another person to answer to
cause you and me makes two
i smoke and i drink and i swear
i push you to your limits as much as i dare
maybe i am just testing your patience and maybe your love
because i got fucked so bad, everything's a blur
can't find no answers to nothing, i turn to distractions
self aware of my ways of self destruction
i ride on the fleeting highs
in hope to counterbalance the lows in my mind
no it does not do me good in the long run
but it was never my goal to be a nun
i indulge in the vices whilst i long for something sturdy, steadfast and strong
something you have been offering me all along
yet i pull out and push you away
give up on me, that is all i can say
let me dwell in my bottomless hole, grapple with my issues
and fight my own demons because now i don't need you
selfish bitch
pre-text: some version of obsessive love.now that i read it, it scares even me.
muse: sda
i pull you in so close to me
and it almost feels victorious
you make me feel so complete that I fall apart within
and I drag you down with me
you say we make each other weak
i say together we are strong
my hidden fears and insecurities act up and you feel bad for me and with me
your secret glorious past puts you on a pedestal so high i cannot reach
you and i do nothing but still hurt each other’s soft spots
but it is the very fact you hurt me this way that
i think i love you
you know why i hurt and how i hurt
and you try everything to make me feel secure
maybe i just want to remember you for all you are
to hold on how you make me feel when you are gone
yes i am a selfish and almost manipulative bitch
and i wonder how you can want me, or even love me
i suppose i want you to feel me with all my intensity
so you will not ever forget me, i want to be your only
special and great one
yes I am a selfish and manipulative bitch
muse: sda
i pull you in so close to me
and it almost feels victorious
you make me feel so complete that I fall apart within
and I drag you down with me
you say we make each other weak
i say together we are strong
my hidden fears and insecurities act up and you feel bad for me and with me
your secret glorious past puts you on a pedestal so high i cannot reach
you and i do nothing but still hurt each other’s soft spots
but it is the very fact you hurt me this way that
i think i love you
you know why i hurt and how i hurt
and you try everything to make me feel secure
maybe i just want to remember you for all you are
to hold on how you make me feel when you are gone
yes i am a selfish and almost manipulative bitch
and i wonder how you can want me, or even love me
i suppose i want you to feel me with all my intensity
so you will not ever forget me, i want to be your only
special and great one
yes I am a selfish and manipulative bitch
nomad
pre-text: written after self-realization that i am constantly leaving...people that i love, for short or long periods of time. esp. after i left sg for usa. guess it can apply to those who travel around...or leave their home country to find a 'second home' only to leave it again to go somewhere else...constantly on the move.
muse: me
A nomad
That is me
I come and go
And I say goodbye
It hurts to know nothing is forever anymore
That I cannot be with everyone at the same time
I don’t want to go
Leaving one place to go some other place
Only to leave again
I am not strong enough to keep on saying bye
Just when I am detached and cold
People warm up to me and touch my heart
And then it hurts me all over again
To say goodbye
It could be a “see you later”
But things will never be the same
Change, which is what this, is all about.
I can never deal with change.
I just want things to be like before.
I do not want to be a nomad.
muse: me
A nomad
That is me
I come and go
And I say goodbye
It hurts to know nothing is forever anymore
That I cannot be with everyone at the same time
I don’t want to go
Leaving one place to go some other place
Only to leave again
I am not strong enough to keep on saying bye
Just when I am detached and cold
People warm up to me and touch my heart
And then it hurts me all over again
To say goodbye
It could be a “see you later”
But things will never be the same
Change, which is what this, is all about.
I can never deal with change.
I just want things to be like before.
I do not want to be a nomad.
only so much
pre-text: built-up frustration of loving or caring about someone who doesn't appreciate the simple fact you are always around for them.
muse:( i'm sure it is some undeserving...) boy
you live your life
and fill me in once in a while
you chase your crazy dreams
and i bring out the pom-poms
you smile and laugh, you are happy
and i feel for you, with you
you cry and kick and scream
and i sit faithfully by you, being your silent strength
i try to make you see how i feel
and you just brush me aside
i give you my all and build my world around you
and you prance within, in your own bubble
i promise you i will always be yours
and you use me like a safety net
i offer you my love
and you patronize me sufficiently
only so much
only this much
i can give to you
and you do not even know
muse:( i'm sure it is some undeserving...) boy
you live your life
and fill me in once in a while
you chase your crazy dreams
and i bring out the pom-poms
you smile and laugh, you are happy
and i feel for you, with you
you cry and kick and scream
and i sit faithfully by you, being your silent strength
i try to make you see how i feel
and you just brush me aside
i give you my all and build my world around you
and you prance within, in your own bubble
i promise you i will always be yours
and you use me like a safety net
i offer you my love
and you patronize me sufficiently
only so much
only this much
i can give to you
and you do not even know
my needs
pre-text: written during a dark time...putting someone above yourself ALL the time can honestly drain you dry of life.
muse: sda
i am empty inside now
given you all that i have and all that i haven't got
part of me wishes there was more that i could offer
but part of me knows that you ain't worth it
it is not because i no longer love you
i love you i really do
but i have to stop now and put my needs before yours
you are used to my unconditional giving and loving
so much that you expect it from me unconsciously
and this is not what i want
i am only human and i am selfish
i want to feel the way i make you feel
that you can count me to be around, to be dependent on me
to know the love i have for you is constant and true
i want to feel that way
but you aren't doing it for me, not anymore
so i got to go
i rather be alone and open to happiness
than shut in a world of weakness with you
muse: sda
i am empty inside now
given you all that i have and all that i haven't got
part of me wishes there was more that i could offer
but part of me knows that you ain't worth it
it is not because i no longer love you
i love you i really do
but i have to stop now and put my needs before yours
you are used to my unconditional giving and loving
so much that you expect it from me unconsciously
and this is not what i want
i am only human and i am selfish
i want to feel the way i make you feel
that you can count me to be around, to be dependent on me
to know the love i have for you is constant and true
i want to feel that way
but you aren't doing it for me, not anymore
so i got to go
i rather be alone and open to happiness
than shut in a world of weakness with you
a hug
pre-text: don't remember who or why i wrote it for. but i like it nevertheless!
muse: someone that i've hugged
a hug
is not like a kiss
not at all invasive
a hug
is not like sex
not always intimate
a hug
breaks down barriers of space and feelings
a hug
speaks for itself
a hug says
i am your friend
a hug says
i have you and you have me
a hug says
you can cry on my shoulder
a hug says
you can let it all out, but i am not letting you go
a hug says
i am here, i will always be here
a hug says
i embrace you for you, all of you
a hug says
feel my energy flow from me to you
a hug says
i may not be be able to protect you always, but i will still try
a hug says
i see past all of you and i still love you
and right now
all i need is such
a hug
fairy tales
pre-text: met my friend of 10, 11 years...and we reminisced about the good ol' days. he reminded me of things i've forgotten about..things that made me laugh then and now.
muse: ac
silly catching games and name-callings
weightless laughs and free flowing tears
simple thinking and petty quarrels
friendships though seemingly fickle, stood the test of time
fairytales provided a rough map of our life
then we grew
in height and weight
in mind and body
we grew up
now we play games of all sorts
the game of life and love
where winning is everything and losing hurts
names we call people are no longer for fun
laughs are heavy with past baggage
executed with care and caution
tears come more easily now
thinking and rationale and logic and mindset and perspective
complicated and twisted and less clean than before
friendships forged now are indeed fickle
looking for directions in life
we look at the map we have
and realised they sold us lives we can never have
but we were children then, you see.
muse: ac
silly catching games and name-callings
weightless laughs and free flowing tears
simple thinking and petty quarrels
friendships though seemingly fickle, stood the test of time
fairytales provided a rough map of our life
then we grew
in height and weight
in mind and body
we grew up
now we play games of all sorts
the game of life and love
where winning is everything and losing hurts
names we call people are no longer for fun
laughs are heavy with past baggage
executed with care and caution
tears come more easily now
thinking and rationale and logic and mindset and perspective
complicated and twisted and less clean than before
friendships forged now are indeed fickle
looking for directions in life
we look at the map we have
and realised they sold us lives we can never have
but we were children then, you see.
nobody's dreamgirl
pre-text: got to be one of my personal favorites, only maybe because i still feel like that...sometimes. okay okay, most of the time. written when i was a teenage girl, guess old issues never go away eh?
muse: myself and the other girls around me
doe-eyed, long silky hair
wears skirts, dresses
baby dresses
soft-spoken, shy and coy
innocent, demure, sweet
can cook, and maybe sew
giggles, with dimples
simple and loyal
does well in school, has a well-planned future
never drinks or smokes
virgin, never goes all the way
skinny waist, flawless skin
fair, shoulder bone protruding
tiny hands,tiny feet
smells good 24/7
plays the piano or netball or dance ballet
next door neighbour
good enough for mummy's little boy
and then there is
me
Bad complexion, limp fine hair
wears jeans, skimply little tops
anything revealing
too lazy to put on makeup
way too loud and obnoxious
sit with my legs open
like my mind
direct, curt and vulgar
drinks to get drunk
smokes to vent or get high or to be cool or spiteful
i holler when i laugh
complicated, too many self-inflicted issues
big feet in need of pedicure
ugly hands, bitten fingernails
slacks through school, constantly searching for a dream or future
don't do sports or music or arts
fat in all the wrong places
hangs out with too many boys
sex is just another activity now
not bad enough to be a bad girl
and that is me
nobody's dreamgirl
muse: myself and the other girls around me
doe-eyed, long silky hair
wears skirts, dresses
baby dresses
soft-spoken, shy and coy
innocent, demure, sweet
can cook, and maybe sew
giggles, with dimples
simple and loyal
does well in school, has a well-planned future
never drinks or smokes
virgin, never goes all the way
skinny waist, flawless skin
fair, shoulder bone protruding
tiny hands,tiny feet
smells good 24/7
plays the piano or netball or dance ballet
next door neighbour
good enough for mummy's little boy
and then there is
me
Bad complexion, limp fine hair
wears jeans, skimply little tops
anything revealing
too lazy to put on makeup
way too loud and obnoxious
sit with my legs open
like my mind
direct, curt and vulgar
drinks to get drunk
smokes to vent or get high or to be cool or spiteful
i holler when i laugh
complicated, too many self-inflicted issues
big feet in need of pedicure
ugly hands, bitten fingernails
slacks through school, constantly searching for a dream or future
don't do sports or music or arts
fat in all the wrong places
hangs out with too many boys
sex is just another activity now
not bad enough to be a bad girl
and that is me
nobody's dreamgirl
burn
pre-text: i felt angry inside with someone, for claiming to care about me and doing things that made me upset. one of life's many ironies i suppose.
muse: (i think it was...) jcjw
u make me burn inside
with every single thing you say or do
a concoction of anger and jealousy and disgust
consciously or not
you add fuel to the fire within me
each raging emotion scalds me
i erupt and blow up in your face
blow things out of proportion
blow whatever we got going on
and the eerie silence follows
you and i rush to put out the fire in me
stamp it dead wash it out wrap it up
in desperate consolation and semi-sincere apologies
but in actual fact i can extinguish the fire on my own
the very burning sensation that causes pain
now stimulates tears that nourish the growth of scars
muse: (i think it was...) jcjw
u make me burn inside
with every single thing you say or do
a concoction of anger and jealousy and disgust
consciously or not
you add fuel to the fire within me
each raging emotion scalds me
i erupt and blow up in your face
blow things out of proportion
blow whatever we got going on
and the eerie silence follows
you and i rush to put out the fire in me
stamp it dead wash it out wrap it up
in desperate consolation and semi-sincere apologies
but in actual fact i can extinguish the fire on my own
the very burning sensation that causes pain
now stimulates tears that nourish the growth of scars
a****
pre-text: i met this friend of mine after almost 10 years...he's all grown up and 'made something of himself' but i still see him as the boy i knew when i was 12.
muse: ac
what has it been?
almost a decade or so
and you tell me you never knew me
i just keep quiet
to me, you are still the boy i once knew
the very first boy i ever liked, and maybe loved
puppy love, is that what they call it?
you have grown up to be a fine young man now
but i still see the kid in you
your face barely changed
you are almost an instinct within me
i cannot just axe you out of my life
you come naturally to me
funny how we never had a picture together
nothing at all to document our relationship
if you want to call what we had that
faded vague memories and nostalgic laughs
are the only things we share
guess we have own lives now
own baggages that weigh us down
seeing you reminds me of the good old times
when we put our all and never thought to hold back
and life was simple and clean
constant is change yet some things never change
and they are a very few selected things
inside i feel somewhat the same, for you
but im wise enough to know the feeling is not mutual
we really grew up, you see.
muse: ac
what has it been?
almost a decade or so
and you tell me you never knew me
i just keep quiet
to me, you are still the boy i once knew
the very first boy i ever liked, and maybe loved
puppy love, is that what they call it?
you have grown up to be a fine young man now
but i still see the kid in you
your face barely changed
you are almost an instinct within me
i cannot just axe you out of my life
you come naturally to me
funny how we never had a picture together
nothing at all to document our relationship
if you want to call what we had that
faded vague memories and nostalgic laughs
are the only things we share
guess we have own lives now
own baggages that weigh us down
seeing you reminds me of the good old times
when we put our all and never thought to hold back
and life was simple and clean
constant is change yet some things never change
and they are a very few selected things
inside i feel somewhat the same, for you
but im wise enough to know the feeling is not mutual
we really grew up, you see.
Thursday, May 12, 2005
eyes of green
pre-text: i looked so hard into someone's eyes to notice this.
muse: sda
your eyes of green
ocean green with depths of black
and a slight tinge of cat yellow
i look into your eyes and
i get lost in you
all of you
your eyes of green
ocean green with depths of black
and a slight tinge of cat yellow
i feel safe and vulnerable
all at the same time
when i look into your eyes
your eyes of green
ocean green with depths of black
and a slight tinge of cat yellow
i look into your eyes
i feel all of you in me and i cry
then i cannot see your eyes of green anymore
b***
pre-text: written for this aussie boy i met in sg for a brief period of time. nothing deep but it still meant something.
muse: b
i felt you the moment i saw you
you are so free and burdenless
all that i used to be
i let myself go in your presence and find myself again
you hold me close and i inhale all of you
then i smell of you and that keeps me going
when im not around you
i think we both know we only have now
and that is probably all we will ever have
no deep talk of shit, just plain indulgence in the moment
you show me what it is to not question
happiness or passion
to grab whatever is offered and savor it
i know i am going to miss you like fuck
this intense yet simple relationship
is something i will hold onto for a long time.
wave after wave
pre-text: this quote "expecting life to treat you well because you are a good person is like expecting an angry bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.-- Shari R. Barr" inspired this. someone was flaunting his happiness in front of me and i got pissed.
muse: jcjw
and hear the words that you spit out
so freely so blatantly
direct and sharp to my face
through my heart and into my soul
you come back wave after wave
i take it all in stride
and act all happy
a puppet for your manipulation
why bother to share your bitterness with me
bad shit happens to good people its true
i give u all i have it is not good enough
you come back
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)